I’ve started to wonder what the idea of a “new” masculinity would actually entail. Is it so simple to separate people who act in “masculine” ways into categories that lead to a version of masculinity that is “new” and even “better” than the others? Or in talking about “new masculinities,” are we talking about the ways in which masculinity itself is no longer a viable determination of gendered categorization at all, and that we must move toward dismantling the whole concept?
I’ve noticed the urgent need for a long-awaited shift in radical and queer spaces. How can you challenge ableism if those most impacted by it cannot (due to systemic implications & challenges) be there at your event?
In the instance of a child being forced to hug an adult even when they don’t want to, they learn to not always trust their gut instincts when it comes to their safety, their surroundings, and the people they don’t know very well or are meeting for the first time.
Because while you can tweet out a prayer and resume your normal life, your conscience clean, the queer community is left picking up the pieces and struggling to make sense of this tragedy – violence that our community knows all too well, especially queer and trans people of color.
The people who say these things (which you may well be, without knowing it) don’t mean to be hurtful. In fact, they tend to be those most trying to be helpful. Which means that if we can just spread the message of what sorts of things not to say, there’s a fair chance they might actually change.
I have come to recognize that there are inherent insecurities that are common to many cis straight men when it comes to sex, but it is the equivalent of social and psychological death to admit.
Self-care has seemed literally impossible. Yet we all know: It is at these moments when it is the most necessary. When turning inward to fight for yourself seems like the last thing you can do, it is the most essential thing.
I hijacked the part of pretty that made me cringe and created a work of art. Find out how you can do the same inside.
I was brainwashed by the positivity movement, which took advantage of my unique ability as a victim/survivor of childhood trauma and sexual abuse to see the positive even in the most harmful situations. The depth of my self-deception was so profound that the glass wasn’t even half full. I was able to drink from an empty cup and convince myself that I was consuming the sweetest, most nourishing nectar. I was practicing the art of minimizing.
Above all I’ve learned that if you are a person with numerous simultaneous mental disorders, your needs are likely to be different and more intensive than the needs of others. I’m here to tell you one thing: your unique struggles deserve dedicated attention.
I’ve learned to stay away from people who project onto my body. My partner and new family do not police each other’s bodies. Sometimes I mess up, because of my upbringing. But I’m dedicated to building a life where I’m valued for the person that I am. Today, I control how I choose to live and I’m feeling pretty good about.
We are multitudes. May each of our journeys with our identities endeavor towards love and learning.
Masculinity Has Proven Itself Deadly: Uncovering the Trauma In Men After Baton Rouge Police Shootings
Too often, men who are suffering do so alone, believing that revealing their personal pain is tantamount to failing at their masculinity.
The Glass Wing Group’s remake of Beyonce’s “Lemonade” is a reminder of the allegiance we must have to our own identities and honoring just how fierce we are regardless of the many isms faced.
Comparison is a thief of joy, and jealousy is often its partner in crime. Whether I’m comparing my body, abilities, or bank account to someone else’s, I do harm to myself if I allow that comparison to rob me of my self-satisfaction and engender envy.