When Mother’s Day is Difficult: How I Survived My Mother’s Death & Relearned How to Live November 2, 2017 by Aabye-Gayle Francis-Favilla 1 Comment This Mother's Day we want to acknowledge those in our community who may have a hard time this Mother's Day due to their passing. We send you love and this note of survival, process and relearning how to live. __________________________________________________________ Some deaths force us to relearn how to live. I’ve survived one such loss. When the keystone of my family … [Read more...]
Breaking Barriers: 5 Black Girls Unapologetically Living Black Girl Magic October 16, 2017 by Aabye-Gayle Francis-Favilla Leave a Comment The idea of black girl magic has been in the ether (and Twittershpere) for a while now, and while it is not without controversy, I choose to recognize its good intentions. Black girl magic is a rallying cry. It is a spotlight on what often gets marginalized. It is a reminder of the wealth of beauty and ability that black women possess but often don’t get credit for. It is a way … [Read more...]
The Evolution of Femininity: Does Radical Self Love Mean I Have to Give Up My Lipstick? August 10, 2017 by Aabye-Gayle Francis-Favilla Leave a Comment On the journey of loving yourself well, it can be difficult to discern which conventions of society are helpful and which ones are harmful. There are many questions I’ve asked myself—especially as a feminist and as a woman. What are the true origins of my modesty? Can I be strong and still like the color pink? Am I offended when someone refers to me as a girl? How do I feel … [Read more...]
We The People: Trump is the Price We Pay for Obama May 19, 2017 by Aabye-Gayle Francis-Favilla Leave a Comment This article was originally published on Write Away and is republished with permission. A rich white man just got what he wanted and people are surprised. Why? Perhaps you think he doesn’t deserve it. Perhaps you think he hasn’t earned it. So what? Taking is the foundation of America. This country was founded by taking. This country was built by taking. First we took land that … [Read more...]
How Honoring “Negative” Emotions Can Help Us Heal January 20, 2017 by Aabye-Gayle Francis-Favilla Leave a Comment A few years ago I was uncomfortably sitting in my in-law’s living room with my husband. My discomfort was rooted in being a spectator to a heated argument my mother-in-law and father-in-law were having. Their emotions were boiling hot. Their voices were loud. I wasn’t sure whether I should look away, sneak out of the room, or leave the house. I looked over at my husband, and he … [Read more...]
7 Radical Self Love Strategies That Positively Impact Your Pockets September 4, 2016 by Aabye-Gayle Francis-Favilla Leave a Comment In order to love yourself well, that love must permeate every aspect of your life. There are many forces in the world that either subtly or overtly encourage the denial or destruction of self—or that foster self-dissatisfaction. One must be vigilant. Loving yourself is important, but it isn’t always easy. It can be a struggle when so much of our culture is entrenched in … [Read more...]
Good Grief: Balancing Radical Self Love & Mourning July 7, 2016 by Aabye-Gayle Francis-Favilla 1 Comment In wake of the police murders of Alton Sterling and Philando Castile,we are publishing this piece to remind you it is okay and necessary to grieve in whatever way that looks like for you. Black death by white officers takes a communal toll and we must allow ourselves to process and create safe space to do so. “I will not say, “Do not weep,” for not all tears are an evil.” ~ … [Read more...]
Getting Close to the Ugly: Owning My -isms August 5, 2015 by Aabye-Gayle Francis-Favilla Leave a Comment Criticism comes easily to me. I have judgmental tendencies. It’s one of my uglier qualities. Usually, when I judge (and then criticize), it’s because I’m writing someone else’s story rather than learning his or her reality. Perhaps it’s human nature. Perhaps it’s just my nature. I use appearances to fill in the blanks. But appearances are just that — they are how things seem. … [Read more...]
Succulent and Wild, As When I Was a Child June 5, 2015 by Aabye-Gayle Francis-Favilla Leave a Comment “A succulent wild woman is one of any age who feels free to fully express herself in every dimension of her life.” ~ SARK (Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy) I hope to be a succulent, wild woman one day — not wild in the sense of violent, but wild like the ocean, wild like a tree or a sunrise. Wild, as in existing in my natural state, being who I was born to be. I want to live … [Read more...]
I Think My Hair Hates Me April 4, 2015 by Aabye-Gayle Francis-Favilla Leave a Comment My hair and I have an on-again, off-again, love-hate relationship. It’s a complicated work in progress. Because I choose to braid my hair (with extensions), and because I often leave the braids in a bit (a lot) longer than I should, it is not uncommon for me to spend hours (and I don’t mean just two or three) unbraiding my hair. Quite often the task will drag into the … [Read more...]
