The dictionary defines loneliness as sadness because one has no friends or company, however, that definition doesn’t remotely articulate the black hole of pain and dread that we can experience when we are feeling lonely. Not to mention it is often something we feel when we are with friends, family and lovers. Research conducted in 2012 surprisingly shows that the loneliest … [Read more...]
Letting Go of the Fantasy: 7 Ways to Heal Toxic Family Relationships
Family dynamics can be tricky. We know, after all, that no family is perfect. Familial relationships can be some of the best support systems, but they can also be difficult and harmful if you're dealing with toxic family members. When you've committed to living a life of radical self-love, having strategies for how to respond to and even heal your toxic family relationships is … [Read more...]
How To Unwrap Yourself From a Toxic Relationship When the Person Is Gone — But Not the Pain
It has been almost two years since I ended my last long-term relationship. It seems so strange that we have now been apart longer than we were together. When it began, I thought I had finally found my person. I soon experienced anxiety and doubt after many red flags started to surface. I had longed to love and share my life with someone and I settled for a toxic relationship … [Read more...]
How I Learned To Challenge Fat Discrimination in Healthcare
I have always been proactive about my health. Even when I was more disconnected from my body in the past, I still worked hard to address issues as they arose. I have dealt with a variety of issues over the years and often had to take my health into my own hands. Fat discrimination in the health industry is something I've read and known about, but I really thought I had been … [Read more...]
Desentramar las capas: Sobrevivir al abuso emocional infantil
Advertencia de contenido: Este artículo utiliza el termino incesto emocional, discute el abuso emocional infantil y las relaciones parentales nocivas. La primera vez que mi terapeuta mencionó el termino incesto emocional me agarró desprevenida. El termino en si genera una reacción de rechazo inmenso. Me anotó la información de un libro para que lo buscara cuando estuviese … [Read more...]
Cómo despegarse de una relación toxica cuando la persona se ha ido pero el dolor prevalece
Han pasado casi dos años desde que termine mi última relación duradera. Parece tan extraño pensar que hemos estado separados mas tiempo del que estuvimos juntos. Cuando empezó, pensé que finalmente había encontrado a esa persona. Pronto empecé a experimentar ansiedad y dudas luego de que muchas señales de advertencia empezaron a surgir. Yo anhelaba amar y compartir mi vida con … [Read more...]
It’s Okay To Start Again: Four Reasons To Go Back to Therapy
After seeing a therapist for almost four years, we had the “graduation” conversation. I had tackled the things that had brought me to therapy in the first place and we had unpacked a great deal of trauma that I hadn’t planned for. I had worked on my family dynamics and learned how important boundaries were to my happiness and health. My therapist and I discussed my progress and … [Read more...]
Don’t Go Exhausted Trying To Fix It All: Learning Boundaries as a “Fixer”
I can’t really remember how young I was when I learned how to be the fixer in my family. I would imagine it happened around the time my brother was born. My mother had emergency gallbladder surgery not long after his birth. My family has always reminisced about what a good big sister I was, because I helped with whatever my mom needed. She wasn’t supposed to lift much, but I … [Read more...]
5 Ways To Deal With Body Parts That Make Us Uncomfortable Without Body Shaming
Even when we have worked hard to move away from body shaming and toxic diet culture toward a life of Radical Self Love and Acceptance, we sometimes slip and our old thoughts start to fire again. It can feel like we are going backwards. It can seem overwhelming and pointless to fight the bombardment of negative body image information we receive all day in the media and the … [Read more...]
How the Trump Administration Is Hurting Older Folks
Despite what you might read in Trump’s daily tweets, many Americans are experiencing hardship under this current administration. This administration is hellbent on rolling back, changing or eliminating programs and legislation that directly impacts people of color, women, LGBTQ individuals, people with disabilities and older Americans in negative and damaging ways. Every time … [Read more...]
Surviving the Comparison Game
A number of years ago I made a commitment to radical self love and my life completely changed. I have worked hard to learn how to make peace with myself and my body and I inhabit myself in a different and genuine way. Most days. I am a human living in a world that constantly tells me I am wrong for a variety of reasons and usually I can cling to what I have learned and … [Read more...]
The Politics of Productivity: 7 Ways To Undo Societal Pressure to Constantly Perform
When my therapist first told me that my value wasn’t linked to how productive or accomplished I was, I actually laughed out loud. Not a little giggle either, but a full-on belly laugh like she had just told me the funniest joke I had ever heard. She repeated it again, with a straight face and I quieted down. We spent many months on this concept, and it is still something that I … [Read more...]
Coming to Peace With Aging
We spend millions of dollars each year on cosmetics, creams and plastic surgery to distance ourselves from the notion of age. Billion-dollar industries tell us every day that their special formula will help us look younger or feel younger, and even the advertisements that seem to embrace the idea of aging, show us images of stereotypical beautiful and thin women and men, who … [Read more...]
What Is Emotional Incest?: Surviving Emotional Abuse in Childhood
Content Warning: This article uses the term emotional incest and discusses childhood emotional abuse and harmful parental relationships. The first time my therapist mentioned the term emotional incest, I was taken aback. The term alone elicits a gut-level reaction. She wrote down the book information for me to look up when I was ready. I wasn’t ready for quite some … [Read more...]
