Being trans is to constantly live a life in terror. But, being trans also means to live a life in one’s own true selfhood. This is the duality of being trans, to live a life of suffering and agony, and to also live a life of self-determination and authenticity. Living a life of terror is to experience various forms of violence on a continuum. From one’s family and friends … [Read more...]
“…But You Look Straight:” My Femme-Identity Does Not Invalidate My Queerness
My femme identity is rooted in conjuring up as much softness and pleasure as I can. This world can be incredibly hard and harmful, especially for marginalized folx. Femme-embodiment is my magic of choice to help me navigate through it all. As magic as is, it also prompts people to approach me with the “… but you look straight” comment upon ‘discovering’ my queerness. The … [Read more...]
50 Ways People Expect Constant Emotional Labor from Women and Femmes
This article was originally published by EverydayFeminism.com and is republished with permission. The work of women and femmes is traditionally undervalued – we get paid less in nearly all professions. But there’s another type of work we’re often expected to do for no pay at all: emotional labor. Emotional labor is the exertion of energy for the purpose of addressing people’s … [Read more...]
Porque así es América: 5 cosas a tener en cuenta sobre Sexismo y Patriarcado 101
Estamos comenzando el año dándote las herramientas para discutir asuntos que afectan a la sociedad. La serie 101 TBINAA es un curso intensivo de género, sexualidad, raza y mucho más. Solo busca 101 y mira todo lo que hemos estado indagando desde entonces. Dentro de “The Body Is Not An Apology” hay una gran cantidad de trabajo alrededor de los tópicos de género, sexismo y … [Read more...]
Gender Has Got Me F*cked Up: Navigating the Pressure to Alter My Boi Body
writer's note: i write in lower case, it's my small rebellion. i’m mad. i’m mad that gender rules that dictate what is “appropriate dress” for female and male bodies have me thinking about surgically altering my body. i love my body. i love how it’s feminine and masculine at the same time. i love the curve of my belly and the muscle line when i flex my triceps. i love … [Read more...]
#MeToo: A Letter to The Women Who Exclude Trans & Non-binary People from “Safe Spaces”
A letter to those who exclude nonbinary trans folk from your safe spaces: I started living my truth as transgender and nonbinary almost a year ago. I’ve been out as queer for many years. And I’ve been in this feminine body my entire life. It’s been a complicated journey, especially for someone who grew up in the South wearing GRITS merch. Having gone through the whole … [Read more...]
How Conservatives are Using Cis Women’s Bodies to Destroy Trans Women’s Lives
Content warning: references to sexual assault; graphic transphobic violence With very few exceptions, almost every woman and non-binary person closest to me has been a survivor of sexual violence, often committed by people in their own families. The perpetrators of these crimes have overwhelmingly been cisgender men, correlating with national data demonstrating … [Read more...]
10 Reasons Cis Men Must Unabashedly Support Trans and Gender Non-Conforming Folks
Trans and gender non-conforming folks have not been at the forefront of rights and access discussions in the United States as much as they are today. Much of these discussions and this attention has been good, with more and more people coming out as trans or gender non-conforming and more and more people supporting them and pushing for laws to protect them. Unfortunately, many … [Read more...]
3 Ways We Can Challenge Gender Norms in Heterosexual Marriages
Not to brag, but my wife’s birthday was earlier this month and I got her an incredible gift. A month or two earlier, she had passively mentioned that she really liked the thought of getting a record player, and had separately said that she was tired of our listening to music on our phones while chilling out in our apartment. My solution was acquiring a sweet audio … [Read more...]
Brett Kavanaugh and #MeToo: What Happened to You Matters
Content warning: discussion of sexual violence and rape culture When I was eight years old, a neighborhood boy who was about 16 was over at my house watching the 1968 version of Romeo & Juliet with me on the VCR in my living room. Apparently my dad let us watch it, something my mom would later excoriate him for, coming from a place of bitter knowledge that women, … [Read more...]
On Loving A “Feminine” Body As A Transmasculine Androgyne
By: Mihran Nersesyan I always felt awkward in my body growing up. Most of us do, but for me - a transmasculine androgyne - it was, I think, more than average. I constantly felt like my body couldn't decide if it wanted to be "male" or "female", as I understood them to be then. My posture, my gait, the way my fat collected on me, my body hair, even my voice. They were all here … [Read more...]
Becoming a Woman On My Own Terms
I am not sure when my ideas about womanhood wrote themselves on my being. Likely it began when I was young, born in the sermons of the Pentecostal church my family attended: “Make up is not a sin,” one pastor told us, “But you want to paint the barn not decorate it.” In those moments, I learned that women were not only objects to these men but objects meant to look pretty but … [Read more...]
Trans People, Trauma, and Dissociative Identities
Many, if not most, of the trans people I’ve known have been coping with at least one form of trauma. We take a lot of abuse from society, often at an early age. I am transgender. I do not currently identify as the sex I was assigned at birth (female). I have also taken physical steps to alter my body and live my life perceived by others as male. However, my gender identity … [Read more...]
Anti-Trans “Feminists” Converted My Friend: Here’s Why We Can’t Stay Silent
I was scrolling through my Facebook feed one average day recently, when all of a sudden I was confronted with a post condemning the recent passage of a bill protecting the rights of transgender youth. The same bill all my other friends, primarily queer and trans, were celebrating. The post was by someone I went to graduate school with… for gender studies. I … [Read more...]
