I have to overcome a lot of issues related to my disability. I was born with cerebral palsy, so I’ve encountered challenges from day one. When you add the fact that I'm a gay man living in the Deep South, a lot of times it’s hard just to live. I’ve only had two romantic relationships in my life. The first was for a little over two years, and my second and most recent one … [Read more...]
5 Ways to Maintain Your Queer Identity in a Relationship People Read as Straight
This article originally appeared in EverydayFeminism.com and is reprinted by permission. In a way, there is a safety that comes with being out in public holding a boy’s hand. I’m seen as straight, feminine, the “right” sort of woman. Nobody harasses me, leering and telling me to kiss him so they can watch. Nobody calls me the d-word or threatens to “turn” me straight. As far as … [Read more...]
Not Everyone’s “Born This Way”: How I Grew Into My Middle-Aged Trans Identity
Two years ago, I came out as queer, kinky, polyamorous, and transgender, all in the space of a few months. I’m not young; I'm approaching the age bracket known as “middle age.” In fact, I worried initially that my coming out explosion was some sort of midlife crisis brought on by reading too many queer comics and following too many trans Twitter accounts. Part of me shies away … [Read more...]
7 Things Not to Say to a Child Wrestling With Their Sexuality
As a young person, I didn’t have any queer adult mentors to teach me about the positivity of exploring my sexual orientation, not to mention my gender identity. Most of what I learned about being LGBTIQ came from '90s mainstream media and my Gay Straight Alliance in high school. After high school, a couple of my friends eventually came out as gay. I listened and learned from … [Read more...]
You’re Worth Loving: My Letter For Those Still in the Closet
Dear you, This letter is for you. Your In The Closet But Still Worth Loving quiet, powerful, gentle celebration. Let me tell you a story. In middle school, I was the opposite of cool. I wore colorful striped leggings. My hair was always frizzy and in a ponytail with one strand hanging down, because I thought that was neat. There was a gap between my front teeth. I didn’t hate … [Read more...]
7 Cosas Ridículas que no hay que decir a gente Bisexual
A lo largo de los años he sido objeto de muchas observaciones bifóbicas. La bifobia no es solo una expresión específica de homofobia para las personas que son “parcialmente” gays. La bifobia viene de la comunidad queer y heterosexual, y en mi experiencia, es una expresión del pensamiento y/o binario que puede ser muy destructivo para nuestro mundo en muchas maneras. Las que … [Read more...]
Smiling Under Capitalism: 14 Ways LGBTQ+ Workers Face Discrimination in the Service Industry
Lately I’ve been puzzled by the number of people who seem to think it’s possible to have a conversation about gender equality and transgender liberation without discussing economic injustice and racialized experiences. One reason this thought is so common is because of mainstream media. While media engaging with certain transgender bodies and experiences has become more … [Read more...]
How White LGBT Spaces Erase Queer People of Colour
This article has been republished from Xtra, and is reprinted here by permission. For as long as I could remember, I had always known I was queer in some way. In the way that my feelings for girls and women around me seemed to be more intense than they were supposed to, or the way that I would feel very strange if I happened to see a sexy scene of a woman in a … [Read more...]
Am I Queer Enough to Claim Queerness?”
If I remember correctly, I was eight. I walked into the kitchen looking for a fork, and thought to myself, “hmm I am attracted to a girl in my class, so I guess that makes me bisexual. Hmmm,” grabbed my fork and went back to my room. I don’t remember learning the word, but I knew what it meant and how to use it. That is the earliest memory I have of me understanding what my … [Read more...]
Queer Eye: Inviting Social Change, One Makeover at a Time
When I first saw an ad for the new Queer Eye, my primary reaction was one of bemusement. I remembered the original Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, and I liked it a lot at the time. I liked how the show would delve more into the lives and backgrounds of the weekly Straight Guys than other makeover shows. I also cannot deny the original show’s importance in LGBTQIA+ … [Read more...]
Flee in Fear or Choose Love?: A Queer Wedding the Day After Pulse
The day after the Pulse Nightclub Massacre, I got married. The timing was random coincidence. A mess of circumstances had surprised us just the week prior, and we realized that Monday, June 13th was the only day that our ideal wedding would be possible. So in five short days, we planned our wedding. No one knew we were about to get married. When we broke the news late on … [Read more...]
Black Liberation Demands Queer Liberation: How the Black Community Must Step-Up to Support the LGBTQ Community in 2018
I’ve been an activist with Black Lives Matter for two years now. My inspiration to found the second Black Lives Matter chapter in Canada stemmed from a desire to bring the lives (and deaths) of Black folks into the Canadian imaginary; to encourage white Canadian settlers to acknowledge their ancestors’ involvement in slavery, colonialism and segregation and to celebrate … [Read more...]
All Bodies Are Holy: Why Selfies Empower My Genderqueer Self
A long time ago, some time in the early to mid-'90s, I was sitting in the back seat of my parents' shitty Ford sedan. In my working-class family’s economy car, there was very little room in the back seat, and my little brother's sweaty head lay heavy against my side. We traveled along the Shoreway with the meager Cleveland skyline to the right and the vast marine nothingness of … [Read more...]
7 Ridiculous Things NOT to Say to Bisexual Folks
Over the years, I have been subjected to many biphobic remarks. Biphobia comes from the queer community and straight community alike. In my experience, it's an expression of binary and either/or thinking, which is destructive in so many ways. The below examples of biphobia aren't even the worst; they're just the most revealing of what the hidden prejudices are against bi … [Read more...]
