“It’s not my responsibility to be beautiful. I’m not alive for that purpose. My existence is not about how desirable you find me.” ~Warsan Shire As an aspiring poet, the words of Warsan Shire hold a special sway over me. It’s not only her eloquence that draws me to her writing, but also the depth of her wisdom. I’ve always felt that it’s not enough … [Read more...]
7 Self-Care Tips for Parents of Young Kids
This article was originally published on Ravishly.com and is republished with permission. Feeling guilty won’t help your kids, but it sure will fuck you up. It started when my wife saw an old Facebook post of hers, one which equated sleeping in with self-care, saying something to the effect of, “wow sleeping 12 hours was exactly what I needed!” It was 5 … [Read more...]
The Feminist Generation Gap: Is There Room for Feminism to Evolve?
In the thirty-plus years I’ve been alive, I’ve seen a number of connotations applied to feminism. Going to an all-girls school and then a women’s college, for most of my life “feminist” was a positive label. It promised us girls we could do anything the boys could do. It was the assertion that we young ladies would grow into women who would shape the world and have equal claim … [Read more...]
7 Things I’m Tired of Hearing as a Disabled Person & What to Say Instead
1.What is wrong with you? /What happened to you? Yes, I know what you mean. Folks wanting to know about my disability has never bothered me. However, phrasing it like this implies that something must have gone wrong. The suggestion that able-bodies are normal and healthy while bodies like mine must be the result of an accident or a mistake. What to say instead: This can be … [Read more...]
When My Relationship With Facebook Became Abusive
My trust in Facebook has been broken, and I am determined not to rebuild it because our relationship has become abusive. Therapists say it’s possible to build trust even after betrayal. But such generalizations must have outliers. Surely it is not possible for some people or relationships to rebuild trust. Because to do so is to ignore the very survival mechanisms … [Read more...]
Mothering As an Act of Resistance: Because the Love of a Mother Is the Most Radical Thing I’ve Ever Known
As Mother’s Day arrives I can’t help but think of those for whom the occasion might be difficult. While all of us come from a woman and thus have had a mother many of those I’ve met have not been mothered or perhaps not mothered in the way they needed. We are too quick to forget that “mother” is a verb as well as a noun. It is a task we choose to take on or not. Like all other … [Read more...]
9 Things Not to Say to a Non-Binary Person
This piece was originally published by EverydayFeminism.com and is republished with permission. (Content notice: anti-trans/non-binary aggression, cissexism) As cliché as it sounds, I always knew I was “different.” I would look at the other boys during recess and think, I know I’m supposed to be like that, and then I would look at the girls and think, But I … [Read more...]
The Activists Speak: On Cultivating a Radical, Revolutionary Self Love
Many of us are getting ready to celebrate love in the various forms it appears in our lives this Valentine’s Day weekend. But we all know, the best love often starts with the love of self. Here at the The Body Is Not An Apology we believe self-love is full of action, of gratitude, of creating safe space and activism. We spoke with a few dynamic, internationally known activists … [Read more...]
