Sharing This Breath: What Sex Looks Like for Me as a Graydemisexual Ace December 23, 2020 by Grace B. Freedom Leave a Comment Hi! My name is Grace, and I am a graydemi ace. I'm what I've previously called an "IAMsexual" who has a lot of sex, just not likely the kind you're imagining. Re-imagining sex as acts that de-center the mainstream idea of sex feels important to understanding how I navigate my relational world. Let me provide you with a scene of what my "IAMsexual" world of sex looks like. We … [Read more...]
Rejecting Fetishization and Lack: Claiming the Fullness of My Black Demisexuality December 21, 2020 by Grace B. Freedom Leave a Comment By Grace B. Freedom My name is Grace and I am a gray demisexual ace. Rewind: gray doesn’t really suit me. It doesn’t feel vibrant enough. I can be a gray demisexual as it pertains to generic understandings of asexuality, but I want to formally declare that I want a new color. Perhaps I will be a gold-flecked cyan demisexual with rich metallic hints and deep blues … [Read more...]
Why I’m Over the Pressure To “Find Love” as an Asexual Person November 7, 2019 by Dawy Rkasnuam Leave a Comment I wish it were more acceptable in this world for people to live life without romantic love — without having it, without wanting it, and without waiting around for it. What tires me most about our cultural view of romantic love is the idea that, even if we don’t have it or want it now, romantic love will ultimately make its way into our lives, and it’s going to change … [Read more...]
Hot Sex After 50: 3 Myths and 3 Truths September 12, 2019 by Jaime Grant Leave a Comment As a longtime sex coach in my mid-50s, I find myself in a constant state of speaking truth to power when it comes to sex and aging. How is hot sex after 50 different from hot sex after 40? Or 20? How is it different from hot sex in the aftermath of divorce? Or during the hottest love affair of our lives? The point is: hot sex matters. It generates and releases energy. It … [Read more...]
Asian and Asexual: How I Came To Own My Asexuality While Fighting Cultural Stereotypes May 2, 2019 by Dawy Rkasnuam Leave a Comment As an Asian American woman who exists on the asexual spectrum, I navigate a tricky space when it comes to sexuality. On one hand, I experience hypersexualization and fetishization based on Orientalist assumptions about Asian women. On the other, I come from a culture of sexual conservatism, where families don’t speak about sex but the expectation of abstinence is always … [Read more...]
Stop Assuming Everyone Wants a Partner: 5 Ways You’re Erasing Asexual & Aromantic People and What to Do Instead May 22, 2018 by Dawy Rkasnuam 1 Comment As someone who identifies as gray asexual—meaning I don’t experience sexual attraction except in a very rare, once in a blue moon case—I see a lot of misconceptions about asexuality and aromanticism, everywhere. I also see a lot of erasure, whether that’s in the form of outright denying that people can be asexual or aromantic, or in the subtler form of portraying sex and … [Read more...]
