As an Asian American woman who exists on the asexual spectrum, I navigate a tricky space when it comes to sexuality. On one hand, I experience hypersexualization and fetishization based on Orientalist assumptions about Asian women. On the other, I come from a culture of sexual conservatism, where families don’t speak about sex but the expectation of abstinence is always … [Read more...]
Undoing the Pressure to “Find Love” as an Asexual Person
I wish it were more acceptable in this world for people to live life without romantic love—without having it, without wanting it, and without waiting around for it. What tires me most about our cultural orientation on romantic love is the idea that, even if we don’t have it or want it now, romantic love is ultimately going to make its way into our lives at some point in the … [Read more...]
Stop Assuming Everyone Wants a Partner: 5 Ways You’re Erasing Asexual & Aromantic People and What to Do Instead
As someone who identifies as gray asexual—meaning I don’t experience sexual attraction except in a very rare, once in a blue moon case—I see a lot of misconceptions about asexuality and aromanticism, everywhere. I also see a lot of erasure, whether that’s in the form of outright denying that people can be asexual or aromantic, or in the subtler form of portraying sex and … [Read more...]
