I’m that girl, the one everybody goes to when there’s a crisis. I’m there, sorting it, finding out, lending a hand, raising money. That’s me. That was me. Then, one day, I was the crisis. And Then She Fell is the soft title of a memoir of recent events that I never plan to write. I keep making up titles for the not-book, though. It helps me try to make sense of senseless … [Read more...]
Advice for Able-Bodied People: Not All of Us Can “Take a Walk” To Feel Better
Over the last few years, I don’t think I would have made it without the internet. When I think of my reduced blueprint for living, I know it was the internet that kept me from feeling completely isolated, frustrated, and stagnant. I still did feel plenty isolated, frustrated, and stagnant, just not completely that way. I would sometimes imagine how I’d get through a pain day … [Read more...]
5 Ways To Find Radical Self-Love and Joy in the Midst of Chronic Pain
Though I have been disabled my entire life and have always written about disability, mine has been an experience with fairly little pain. Muscle spasms are common for me and vary in severity, but they have always seemed nothing more than uncomfortable and inconvenient. Sure, they hurt sometimes and occasionally with great intensity, but they're mostly short-lived. As most … [Read more...]
Why Policing Disabled Folks’ Self-Diagnosis Is Classist
I get into arguments with people on the Internet a lot these days. It’s kind of one of the only ways to be a disability activist when there are a lot of days where you can’t leave your bed. The most recent argument I had was with a particular kind of ableist disabled person, which, oxymoronic as it sounds, is a thing that actually exists. In fact, I’ve encountered way too … [Read more...]
When Healthy Isn’t an Option: How I Learned To Love My Chronically Ill Body
This article first appeared on Ravishly and is reprinted by permission. Once upon a time, I counted calories, carbs, and fat. I weighed myself every day, and I exercised for hours at the gym. I viewed my body as the enemy, and I beat it into submission through sheer force of will. I lost 100 pounds, and I kept most of it off. But I am not healthy, and I never will be. I'm … [Read more...]
How I Learned To Challenge Fat Discrimination in Healthcare
I have always been proactive about my health. Even when I was more disconnected from my body in the past, I still worked hard to address issues as they arose. I have dealt with a variety of issues over the years and often had to take my health into my own hands. Fat discrimination in the health industry is something I've read and known about, but I really thought I had been … [Read more...]
7 Ways Anxiety Can Affect a Person (That You Might Not Know)
I have dealt with anxiety since I was a teenager. As it is a chronic condition, the severity of it comes and goes. Sometimes I feel fine; the anxiety is quietly humming away in the background and I can carry on as normal. Other times, I feel so unwell that I can’t do much more than get out of bed. It is not unheard of for me to take a day off from work or cancel an … [Read more...]
Carving Out My Own Masculinity as a Disabled Trans Man
When I was in the Job Corps and had to choose a trade to learn, I chose the one that most of the male students and the masculine-identified AFAB (assigned female at birth) ones did: construction. It was, to the sensibilities of a bunch of working-class 16-to-24-year-olds, the only trade offered that was macho enough. And I sucked at it. I was clumsy. Motor coordination and … [Read more...]
How Abled Folks Can Support the Disability Movement if Obamacare Is Repealed
As I write this, there are people in this terrifying administration still actively trying to repeal the Affordable Care Act – the only reason that I, and many other disabled and chronically ill people in the US, have access to health insurance. If the ACA is overturned, we’ll return to the old system: one in which insurance companies can charge whatever they want, their … [Read more...]
Living With Multiple Mental Illnesses: 7 Things To Know & How To Be a Better Ally
My step-dad said to me recently, “When it comes to mental illness, comorbidity is the name of the game.” He wasn’t wrong. Comorbidity refers to having more than one chronic illness at once. Of all the people who experience mental disorders in the U.S. (roughly one in five), 45% of them meet the criteria for two or more disorders. That’s almost one in ten people who may be … [Read more...]
Mothering with Disabilities: How Pro Breast-Feeding Turns into Shaming
I was happy when I got pregnant. As a disabled person with multiple chronic illnesses I wasn’t sure if pregnancy was possible, but we had tried anyway. I had to go off my medications, when I became pregnant, but luckily the pregnancy hormones helped with some of my symptoms. Eventually I started taking steroids when the pregnancy hormones stopped being effective, but I was just … [Read more...]

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