This article was originally published on Medium under the title "How Do We Hold Each Other Accountable When We Mess Up?" and is republished with permission. It’s hard work being accountable. It’s even harder holding others accountable. As someone who has been on all sides of accountability: asking for help to stop harm I’m experiencing, needing to be held accountable for harm … [Read more...]
4 Ways White People Can Process Their Emotions Without Hijacking the Conversation on Racial Justice
This article originally appeared in EverydayFeminism.com under the title "4 Ways White People Can Process Their Emotions Without Bringing the White Tears" and is reprinted by permission. If you’re a white person who has been in many activist spaces, then you’ve probably experienced a specific, often unspoken ground rule: There’s no room for white tears in this … [Read more...]
Don’t Go Exhausted Trying To Fix It All: Learning Boundaries as a “Fixer”
I can’t really remember how young I was when I learned how to be the fixer in my family. I would imagine it happened around the time my brother was born. My mother had emergency gallbladder surgery not long after his birth. My family has always reminisced about what a good big sister I was, because I helped with whatever my mom needed. She wasn’t supposed to lift much, but I … [Read more...]
Fat Black Queer Femmes Are the Fetishized Backbones of Our Communities — But Who Takes Care of Us?
This article was originally published on Rest for Resistance as "Labor, Chaotic Desire & Belonging: On Blackness, Femininity, and Queerness" and is republished with permission. This is for the queer fat Black femmes. As children, we learn that we never occupy just one, but all, of our identities. Not a fat girl or a Black girl, but a fat Black girl. In elementary school, … [Read more...]
5 Ways to Respond to Racism While Online Dating
Online dating has become less of a taboo in recent years. With society’s rising dependence on technology and social media, it was only a matter of time before we collectively became more comfortable with the idea of meeting our potential soulmates and "friends with benefits" online. For some of us, it’s even become fun. There are bars that dedicate nights for people to come in … [Read more...]
