How Stigmatizing Male Emotional Vulnerability Has Created a Crisis for Us All September 13, 2019 by Kali Holloway 2 Comments This article first appeared on AlterNet under the title "Toxic Masculinity is Killing Men: The Roots of Men and Trauma" and is reprinted by permission. “The three most destructive words that every man receives when he’s a boy is when he’s told to 'be a man.'” — Joe Ehrmann, coach and former NFL player If we are honest with ourselves, we have long known that … [Read more...]
Rejecting the “Real Man” Myth: Why Men Should Embrace Their Femininity August 8, 2019 by Philippe Leonard Fradet 1 Comment Associating oneself with specific “masculine” or “feminine” traits is a big part of how most people define their gender identities. However, some of the biggest issues arise when it is deemed “inappropriate” for someone to exhibit traits of the “opposite” gender. Take, for example, men who exhibit a strong sense of emotional sensitivity. This trait is typically aligned with … [Read more...]
Black Girls Cut Too: Self-Harm and Intergenerational Trauma July 5, 2019 by Stacey Stevenson, Guest Writer Leave a Comment Content note: detailed references to self-harm methods I started burning myself at 15. A friend and I burned ourselves in an attempt to engrave a symbol on our arms. After going to the local mall and buying a book on witchcraft, we decided we needed a symbol of our commitment to our new two-person coven. We drew up a draft of our symbol containing our initials (S & T) and … [Read more...]
3 Reasons Why Growing Up Isn’t for Me December 5, 2018 by Michal MJ Jones Leave a Comment Although I’ve found many beautiful things about growing up, maturing, and becoming more settled in who I am and what I value, there are times that I still question my “progress” within the benchmarks that are set by mainstream society. To me, maturity is a shifting and growing in-depth understanding of ourselves, how we operate in relation to others, and how our … [Read more...]
6 Reasons Being Angry Doesn’t Mean You’re Hateful: It Means You Value Your Boundaries September 12, 2018 by Shannon Weber Leave a Comment I’ve learned a lot of things about anger in my life. Growing up, I learned to be there for other people when they were angry, helping soothe their unruly emotions, or at least bearing witness to them, packing away my own emotions until they felt like a choking, gnawing grief I couldn’t shake. (There wasn’t enough room for my grief, for my anxiety at being parentified… I … [Read more...]
6 Ways Gender Stereotypes Make Mental Illness Invisible in Men July 25, 2018 by Philippe Leonard Fradet Leave a Comment Mental health issues affect everyone, no matter how you identify. This is true regardless of whether you receive a classic psychiatric diagnosis or work to recognize the symptoms of mental illness in your own life or in the lives of those you love. This fact comes as no surprise to many of us, but for some, there is a strong denial that they are affected by mental health … [Read more...]
It’s OK to Be Vulnerable, Men April 7, 2018 by Dustin "Doc" Lehmann Leave a Comment This article was originally published on The Good Men Project and is republished with permission. “Pain is just weakness leaving the body.” “Be a man.” “Stop crying like a little bitch.” “Don’t be such a pussy.” Sound familiar? Yeah, it does to me too, unfortunately. One needs to do nothing more than watch the video of a young Amar Collins, posted by his father on … [Read more...]
4 Problems with the Trauma-Leads-to-Fatness Narrative June 17, 2017 by Virgie Tovar Leave a Comment This piece first appeared on the author’s blog under the title "4 Problems with the Trauma-Leads-to-Fatness Narrative" and is reprinted here by permission. I've seen the fatness-as-a-product-of-trauma conversation pop up about five times in my feed this week. Though I have no desire to belittle the truly stultifying realities and effects of trauma (sexual and otherwise), … [Read more...]
