Content Note: This article references a parent's use of Weight Watchers for their child. I didn’t always hate and hide my body. I was athletic as a child. I swam competitively and played outside until the last drop of daylight. I trusted my body and knew it well. That changed when puberty hit in the fourth grade. I started to look more like a woman than a little kid, and a … [Read more...]
6 Situations Where Weight Loss May Not Make Sense – Even if You Think It Does
This post was originally published by EverydayFeminism under the title "6 Scenarios Where Intentionally Changing Your Weight Doesn't Make Sense -- Even If You Think It Does" and is republished here with permission. Content note: This article contains references to weight loss, dieting, and eating disorders. I met with a new specialist to talk about the osteoporosis I’ve … [Read more...]
How To Talk About Body Image Issues When You’re Not Fat
It’s hard to grow up in the world that we live in and not have body image issues. No matter what you look like, you undoubtedly have been exposed to advertising or messaging that tells you there's something wrong with the way you look. From “detox” teas to “anti-aging” skincare products to shapewear, someone somewhere is constantly telling us that there is something we need to … [Read more...]
6 Ways My Parents Unintentionally Taught Me Disordered Eating
This article was originally published on EverydayFeminism.com and is republished with permission. Content Note: This article contains discussion of eating disorders, including descriptions of restriction practices and family diets. There’s only one time in my life I ever remember seeing my dad cry. It wasn’t at his mother’s funeral or his father’s, though I knew he was sad … [Read more...]
How I Convinced Myself I Didn’t Have an Eating Disorder — And Returned to Myself Through Fierce Black Self-Love
Content note: This article discusses eating disorders (including bulimia and anorexia), weight loss, and "thinspiration". It began with a love of tattoos: the permanence of art on an impermanent body, the buzz of the machine, the stinging and the bleeding and the healing. And by “it,” I mean how I taught myself to call my eating disorder “inspiration” -- and thus … [Read more...]
When You Call Me Skinny (Hint: It’s Not a Compliment)
Content note: This article contains extended discussion of familial fat-shaming, attempted weight loss, dieting, and eating disorders. In a radical self-love webinar I took with TBINAA founder Sonya Renee Taylor, she asked participants to recall their first memory of body shame. Everyone had one. I went blank. I had none. The truth was, I had far too many. My entire life … [Read more...]
Fantasy or Disrespect?: 7 Halloween Costume Pitfalls to Avoid
Halloween is eagerly anticipated by many. It's an opportunity to eat candy, dress up, and revel in nerdy pastimes or scary movies. Yet all too often, enjoying Halloween is a privilege experienced by people who don't have their identity infringed on by well-meaning, ignorant, or outright hateful celebrants. This is not only a problem with individuals, but with industry; with … [Read more...]
7 Things I Wish People Knew About Being a Fat Woman
This article originally appeared on SHESAID and has been republished with permission. I used to spend a lot of time wondering if people were polite to my face and rude behind my back, probably because I’ve caught people doing that before. To my face they’d tell me how cute my outfit was. Then I’d turn around and they’d make a comment about how “brave” I was for wearing a skirt … [Read more...]
Gordofobia 101: 6 herramientas para desmontar los estigmas sobre el peso
Yo, como gorda de toda la vida, he sido el blanco de estigmas sobre el peso y gordofobia desde que tengo uso de razón, solo que no sabía que lo que estaba viviendo era una forma de discriminación. Supuse que me lo merecía porque estaba gorda y punto. Entonces, hace pocos años, me introdujeron en el mundo del activismo contra la gordofobia y la aceptación del cuerpo. Ahí aprendí … [Read more...]
6 Ways I Was Taught To Be a “Good Fatty” — And Why I Stopped
This article was originally published on EverydayFeminsim.com and is republished with permission. I wasn’t born fat. I came into fatness as a teenager. This was in part because of medication that increased my water retention drastically and in part because puberty gave me huge breasts, with a belly and thighs to match. And I was lucky, in some ways. My mother was also fat, and … [Read more...]
“I Can’t Believe She Wore That!”: What Shaming Others Reveals About Our Own Body Shame
One day at the grocery store, I saw three young people walking through the parking lot. One of the girls wore short shorts. Very short shorts. And Ugg boots. I commented -- a lot. My children were with me. I didn’t think at the time about what they processed as I ranted about how short the shorts were. How ridiculous she looked wearing Uggs in July. My own words came back to me … [Read more...]
“Normal” Bodies Don’t Exist: Celebrating Your Body in the Face of Fatphobia
I remember once when I was thirteen years old in the middle of PE class. A teacher came along and told us that we would soon be having swimming lessons over at a nearby private school’s swimming facilities. At first, I was excited. I like swimming, I had a swimming pool at home, and my standard swimming costume of a one-piece, a rash shirt, and board shorts was something I … [Read more...]
3 Reasons We Need To Be Critical of Compulsory Sex Positivity in Queer Spaces
Sex positivity often acts as an implicit — or sometimes explicit — foundation of leftist, feminist, and LGBTQ+ spaces for completely valid reasons. As women and queers, sex has been the driving force behind both our oppression and the spaces we create to separate, heal, and liberate us from our oppression. Sexualized spaces for socializing predate our modern understanding of … [Read more...]
5 Dehumanizing Myths About Fat Men and Dating That We Can’t Excuse
About a month ago, one of my sisters tagged me in a video she recorded of Family Feud, a game show where two families compete for a cash prize by trying to find the most popular answers to a variety of questions. On the episode she recorded, host and comedian Steve Harvey asks the contestants to answer a rather loaded statement: “Name a reason a woman might decide to be with a … [Read more...]
