How Do We Really See Each Other Across Identities?: Notes From A Queer Breakup December 10, 2019 by The Queer Insomniac Leave a Comment Almost a year after separating from my partner, we had a second breakup. Our first breakup, though incredibly painful, was what I can only describe now as tender. After trying to surmount the difficulty of a nearly ten-year age difference, our romantic relationship ended upon the realization that I was not yet ready to "settle down" and wanted more time to explore life as … [Read more...]
8 Things That Happened When I Stopped Shaving (Spoiler: Most Are Pretty Rad) November 25, 2019 by Ella Mendoza Leave a Comment I remember growing up, I was a big fan of the TV show “That 70's Show." It had a catchy intro and featured a group of teenagers, one of them even a migrant like me! In one episode, one of the characters went ring shopping for his girlfriend. The store owner tried to help him choose a ring by putting it on and pretending to be her. However, the boyfriend was “thrown off” by the … [Read more...]
Why I’m Wary of Being Friends With You When None of Your Friends Are Marginalized November 5, 2019 by Caleb Luna Leave a Comment One day I was grappling with shame and self-consciousness over my tendency to take stock of the kinds of people new people in my life surround themselves with. I was thinking about this in relation to bodies and, specifically, race and fatness. Until that moment I had internalized this behavior as unnecessary, judgmental, and even shallow. But I had a realization that allowed … [Read more...]
Learning to Wear Red Lipstick: The Empowerment of Self-Presentation October 17, 2019 by Julie Feng 1 Comment A couple of years ago, I complimented a classmate on her outfit as we were waiting for the professor to arrive. “I love that lipstick color on you,” I said. “Thanks!” she replied. “It was just a red lipstick kind of day, you know?” “Well, I don’t really wear red lipstick, but it looks so gorgeous on you,” I said. “Why don’t you?” she asked. “I bet you’d look amazing with it … [Read more...]
Mixed-Race, Non-Binary, Queer Fat Femme: How I Fail and Succeed in Finding Liberation August 15, 2019 by Cicely Blain Leave a Comment I am a Black, mixed-race, fat, queer, non-binary person. Most saliently, I am femme. I have come to understand radical femmeness, femme magic, femme community, femme love, and femme power through my relationships with other womxn and femmes of color. While femme communities evoke safeness and security for me, they also often exist on the basis of trauma. Femininity leaves us … [Read more...]
El Amor Romantico Nos Mata: Quien Cuida De Nosotros Cuando Somos Solteros? August 11, 2019 by Caleb Luna and Ana Maroto Leave a Comment Soy una persona deprimida, pero deprimida es un verbo. Considero mi depresión como el resultado de una posición social y de la inevitable historia de colonización, racismo, del estigma de la gordura y de la discriminación. Estoy tomando antidepresivos, pero éstos solo pueden reprogramar la química de mi cerebro y no la realidad social y material en la que vivo. No puede … [Read more...]
50 Ways People Expect Constant Emotional Labor from Women and Femmes July 10, 2019 by Suzannah Weiss, Guest Author Leave a Comment This article was originally published by EverydayFeminism.com and is republished with permission. The work of women and femmes is traditionally undervalued – we get paid less in nearly all professions. But there’s another type of work we’re often expected to do for no pay at all: emotional labor. Emotional labor is the exertion of energy for the purpose of addressing people’s … [Read more...]
Let’s Stop Acting as if Queers Need to Look a Certain Way to be Queer April 27, 2019 by Shannon Weber 1 Comment In my city, there’s a monthly queer-women-and-company dance event called Flannel Takeover. It’s supposed to be a tongue-in-cheek reference to the visuals of being a queer woman: someone who wears lots of flannel. Line up, ladies and trans gents and non-binary folks! Grab a beer, don your snapback, aaand let’s perpetuate the lazy stereotype that queer woman equals masculine. A … [Read more...]
Hair Apparent: Being Brown, Femme and Loving My Body Hair September 28, 2018 by Scherezade Siobhan Leave a Comment There is a tumbr post making the rounds on my dash. The first picture in the series is of an Iranian princess Zahra Khanom Tadj es-Saltaneh from the Qajar dynasty. The legend goes - she was considered so beautiful that about a dozen or so men died after she rejected them. The photograph stands in stark contrast to the usual “exotic” representation of Middle astern princesses … [Read more...]
