This article was originally published on The Good Men Project and is republished with permission. “Pain is just weakness leaving the body.” “Be a man.” “Stop crying like a little bitch.” “Don’t be such a pussy.” Sound familiar? Yeah, it does to me too, unfortunately. One needs to do nothing more than watch the video of a young Amar Collins, posted by his father on … [Read more...]
3 Confessions of a Male Emotional Eater
A Growing Boy I was eight years-old the first time I ate so much that I threw up. The meal was spaghetti with ketchup and Parmesan cheese, a classic of my childhood served at least once every week or two when my parents were just too tired to make anything more complicated. It was normal for me to have second helpings on these evenings, but for some reason that night, … [Read more...]
Is Healthy Masculinity a Lost Cause?: A Non-binary Person’s Thoughts on New Masculinity
Toxic masculinity is the subject of much discussion in our radical self-love community. Fashioning a new masculinity that counters and dismantles its toxic counterpart is an essential element in our our fight against cis-hetero-patriarchy. We’re making great strides by having these discussions, and as masculine people, by seeking to embrace accountability. We’re posing many … [Read more...]
#YouStillGood?: Continuing the Conversation on Black Men & Mental Health
No stranger to controversy, Chicago, IL-based rapper Kanye West recently broke headlines for making some outlandish comments about undocumented immigrants while saying he supports Trump at a concert. At a following event, which coincidentally featured an also recently embattled healthier Kid Cudi, Kanye ranted about artists Beyoncé and Jay-Z in a way that many called erratic … [Read more...]
Coming Into My Gender: 5 Reasons Identifying as a Demiguy Brings Me Both Fear & Freedom
I identify as demiguy, and I use they/them pronouns. What does that mean, you ask? Demigender is defined as the gender identity one holds when they identify with one aspect of the gender spectrum, but not completely. This identity is related to other nonbinary identities in that they both inherently reject the idea that gender is restricted simply to man and woman. Being … [Read more...]
Why As a Man, I Need Feminism
Originally published on aymankuzbari.blogspot on November 2012, published with permission. "I am a feminist." This statement has caused several kinds of reactions when coming from me, a male. Ranging from an inquisitive if not suspicious "why?" to sweet praise borne not out of understanding, but rather out of amazement if not amusement. And yet the one reaction I've … [Read more...]
Weightlifting and Self-Love: On Being the Little Guy in the Weight Room
For 60 to 90 minutes, three days a week, my universe consists of a few hundred pounds of iron and a pair of headphones. I am a weightlifter. Not a bodybuilder, not a powerlifter, but a weightlifter. Ostensibly, I lift because it’s my “me” time. I take satisfaction in watching the numbers in my little training log move up just a bit more than the session before. Really, though, … [Read more...]
Clenched Fist: Toxic Masculinity Always Equals Violence
In a time where the plight of Bill Cosby is mourned just as it is celebrated, yet not his victims. When Donald Trump supporters forget the evils such patriarchy and bullying has done in America, we pause as one details their own relationship to hetero-patriarchal masculinity and the ways it always equals violence. Bullying has been a part of my life for as long as I can … [Read more...]
The Body Is Not an Apology
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