Content note: This article contains references to suicidal ideation and a suicide attempt. I have always lived one step away from suicide. Or more specifically, the way I manage my suicidal thoughts is through imagery. Suicide sits in a cage in my brain. The cage is locked. I have the key but I won’t use it because of my son. I made that decision after my first and only … [Read more...]
4 Formas de en las que los varones pueden asumir trabajo emocional en una relación (y por qué deberían)
Ya sean románticas, sexuales, platónicas o profesionales, las emociones siempre jugaran un rol fundamental en que tan exitosa o poco exitosa es cualquier relación. Las relaciones, por definición, requieren que dos o más partes aporten cierta cantidad de esfuerzo emocional para mantener la relación a flote. A menudo sucede que una sola persona afronta el choque emocional, … [Read more...]
The Strain of “Model Minority”: Addressing the Mental Health Needs of Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders
Just last year, when a person very close to me admitted she was struggling with depression, my initial internal reaction was disbelief. This can’t be true, I thought. My next thought was mortification for feeling this way. Why was it that I, a socially conscious person who believes strongly in mental health advocacy, immediately felt incredulity? I had to be honest with … [Read more...]
6 señales de advertencia de que tu amistad es abusiva
Las dinámicas toxicas no están reservadas solo para relaciones afectivas o sexuales. Cualquier relación que tengas con otra persona puede ser saludable: una fuente de positividad y empoderamiento mutuo. Cualquier relación con otra persona también puede por lo tanto ser no saludable: abuso emocional. Puede ser difícil reconocer el abuso emocional cuando viene de amigos en lugar … [Read more...]
Seeking Great-Aunt Sarah: Learning From the Abuse of My Disabled Ancestor
Great-aunt Sarah, age 12 [Image description: This 1921 black-and-white photograph shows the author's great-aunt Sarah as a girl of 12 standing on the grounds of a state school in Wrentham, MA. She is a white girl with shoulder-length brown hair pulled back on the top with a large bow. Her dress is white and extends below her knees, and she is wearing leather lace-up shoes. She … [Read more...]
7 Ways I Take Care of Myself During Depressive Episodes
I have been living with Bipolar Disorder and Generalized Anxiety Disorder for about 14 years now. Along the way, I've learned that the taboo around talking about mental illness needs to end. It does not further growth, healing, or self-love, so let’s just go ahead and throw it out the window. I've found a few tricks to ease the blow of my depressive episodes and dark mood … [Read more...]
4 Ways To Make Space for Non-Binary People When Discussing Eating Disorders
For the past many years, I have struggled with an eating disorder. Searching for a therapist, I have called several locations. Each time, they assumed that because of my voice I was a man and would want to be a part of their men’s services. When I corrected and explained that I'm not a man, they assumed I was a woman and would want treatment with other women. My options always … [Read more...]
Excommunicate Me From the Cult of Toxic Social Justice
“confronting racism, sexism and all the underlying structural oppressions of our system is never easy, and taking a good, hard look at our own privilege is inevitably a painful process. but there’s a harshness in the air now that is more intense than i’ve seen in fifty years of involvement in social justice struggles.” --starhawk in building a welcoming movement “solidarity … [Read more...]
4 Dating Tips for Mentally Ill, Disabled, and Neurodivergent People
Over the past three years, I’ve learned a lot about the ways in which my brain and body work. I’ve learned that the intense sadness and stress I dealt with in high school did, in fact, qualify as depression and anxiety, and that I could and should seek support for those things. I learned that the extreme physical and mental exhaustion I felt after completing a few days of … [Read more...]
50 Ways People Expect Constant Emotional Labor From Women and Femmes
This article was originally published by EverydayFeminism.com and is republished with permission. The work of women and femmes is traditionally undervalued – we get paid less in nearly all professions. But there’s another type of work we’re often expected to do for no pay at all: emotional labor. Emotional labor is the exertion of energy for the purpose of addressing people’s … [Read more...]
Black Girls Cut Too: Self-Harm and Intergenerational Trauma
Content note: detailed references to self-harm methods I started burning myself at 15. A friend and I burned ourselves in an attempt to engrave a symbol on our arms. After going to the local mall and buying a book on witchcraft, we decided we needed a symbol of our commitment to our new two-person coven. We drew up a draft of our symbol containing our initials (S & T) and … [Read more...]
How I Survived a Spanking Household
Content note: This article contains descriptions of domestic violence and traumatic assault. When my ex-spouse and I were dating, we had the the usual getting-to-know-each-other talks — with a deeper dimension, since we had known each other as kids and had reconnected as adults. As we delved deeply into our personal histories, each providing individual perspectives on our … [Read more...]
Desentramar las capas: Sobrevivir al abuso emocional infantil
Advertencia de contenido: Este artículo utiliza el termino incesto emocional, discute el abuso emocional infantil y las relaciones parentales nocivas. La primera vez que mi terapeuta mencionó el termino incesto emocional me agarró desprevenida. El termino en si genera una reacción de rechazo inmenso. Me anotó la información de un libro para que lo buscara cuando estuviese … [Read more...]
Why I’m “Out” as a Person With Mental Illness
Far and away, the most frequently asked question I receive as a writer with bipolar and anxiety is, “How did you get to a place where you could be this open about your struggles?” It’s usually followed with a question like, “Aren’t you scared?” I used to be terrified. Like many folks with a mental illness, one of the first things we’re told is to keep it to ourselves. At … [Read more...]
