Content note: This article discusses sexual, physical, and emotional abuse at length. Victims of childhood abuse, rape survivors, and victims of domestic abuse are really good at one thing: feeling guilty. We can feel guilty about everything, particularly things that aren’t our responsibility. Survivors are taught to feel responsible for the actions of perpetrators and, as a … [Read more...]
Content note: This article contains references to incest, childhood sexual abuse, and suicidal ideation. Admitting you need therapy can be hard. Finding a therapist can be very tough. Finding a good culturally competent therapist can be downright daunting. I was first put into therapy when I was ten years old. My mother, who has borderline personality disorder, was able to … [Read more...]
Dear Mom, On November 17, 2005 you passed away. You were the only little person in your family, one of nine children eight of which had the Cecil trademark of red hair, green eyes and freckles. You had me at 24, and I came out the same way. I must admit, I never thought about what a miracle that was until 35 years later, I had my own daughter, Kaya Rose. No red hair, no green … [Read more...]
Over the last year I have gotten married, had a baby, switched jobs and moved half way across country, all while being depressed and scared of the dangers all around me. Like the world was moving too fast and I needed a pause button. What I honestly imagined would be a “sabbatical writing retreat” otherwise known as my 6 weeks of maternity leave, turned out to be the most … [Read more...]
I was happy when I got pregnant. As a disabled person with multiple chronic illnesses I wasn’t sure if pregnancy was possible, but we had tried anyway. I had to go off my medications, when I became pregnant, but luckily the pregnancy hormones helped with some of my symptoms. Eventually I started taking steroids when the pregnancy hormones stopped being effective, but I was just … [Read more...]
The Body Is Not an Apology
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