In the ten years of raising my son, I have made a lot of parenting mistakes. These missteps range from small things, such as not knowing my son’s school schedule and missing school events, to bigger things, like being so depressed that I cannot even get him to school some days. I could write about any number of my parenting mistakes, but by far, the biggest mistake I make is … [Read more...]
An Updated Birth Announcement, 22 Years Later For My Transgender Kid
In August of 1992, when I was five months pregnant, I went in for my sonogram and asked to be told the gender of my baby. The technician looked at the image and said, "It's a girl!" [Image description: The photograph shows a sonogram image of a baby at five months' gestation. The image is blurry, in black and white, and in a triangular shape against a black background … [Read more...]
Please Don’t Sexualize My Daughter: Learning the Balance of Freedom & “Good” Parenting
When my daughter, P, started to attended a small “unschool”, she discovered not only a joyous education but also the joy of colored hair. Unschoolers believe that children learn better when they pick what they learn and how to learn said subjects. It wasn’t surprising to find kids who like our kids picking also how they wished to present themselves to the world. The girls at … [Read more...]
To My LGBTQ Latino Son After Pulse: The Only Grief I feel Is For the World
To My Son, When you came out to me last year, it was kind of an awkward forced situation. We found some things on your social media device and we wanted to make sure you were safe. I told you then “You don’t have to tell us anything you’re not ready to but we just want to make sure you’re not trolling anyone.” You flushed furiously not so much, I think, at us asking about … [Read more...]
#MeToo: Will My Son Grow up to be a Rapist?
After the flurry of #MeToo’s had died down in my social media feed, it was not fears for my daughter which kept me awake that night. Not because I know she won't be violated at some point in her life. She will, unless she's exceedingly lucky, because living in our abusive culture means it is practically inevitable. My job is to love and educate her as hard as I can, which also … [Read more...]
Fat Parenting 101: 7 Things to Know as a Fat Parent
Parents of all sizes have to navigate how to teach their kids about bodies. But for us fat parents it can be even more challenging because we have to deal with internalized fatphobia as well as the fatphobia directed at us from the world (and sometimes our kids). These thoughts are things that have worked for me as I have navigated being a fat parent raising (hopefully) … [Read more...]
Protect Your Children, Watch Your Mouth: How Parents Can (and Must) Foster Positive Body Image
To the Father of the Little Girl, Whom He Teased Publicly About Being 'Fat' Dear Sir, I’m guessing you didn’t mean intentional harm when you laughed loudly and instructed your young daughter to get on the scale at the Publix supermarket so you could see how “fat” she was. I’m sure you didn’t mean anything by your thoughtless remark. In fact, you acted quite tickled with … [Read more...]
When Mother’s Day is Difficult: How I Survived My Mother’s Death & Relearned How to Live
This Mother's Day we want to acknowledge those in our community who may have a hard time this Mother's Day due to their passing. We send you love and this note of survival, process and relearning how to live. __________________________________________________________ Some deaths force us to relearn how to live. I’ve survived one such loss. When the keystone of my family … [Read more...]
What I Teach My Son When I Say I Am Fat: Practicing Self Love for Our Children’s Sake
This piece first appeared on the author's blog, Bipolar Spirit, and is reprinted here by permission. You can read more of Katie's work on her site RevKatieNorris.com. In When Your Mother Says She's Fat by Kasey Edwards, the author writes a letter to her mom about what she learned when her mother insulted herself about her weight. What Edwards learned struck a cord for me – and … [Read more...]
As A Mother of Children with Disabilities, I Am Tired… and Here’s Why
I am the mother of five children, three have disabilities. I am tired. I imagine many parents of children with disabilities may feel tired. However, it is important to know that I am not tired because my children have disabilities. Nor am I tired from running around to therapies or because of the care they need. In many ways, raising my children is no different than raising any … [Read more...]
On This Edge: Creating Safe Space for Gender-Neutral Youth
I started going to Rowe Camp, a small summer camp nestled in the mountains of western Massachusetts, when I was twelve years old. I fell in love with the camp immediately and spent every subsequent summer of my teenage years in the verdant woods and graffitied cabins of Rowe. Everyone I've met who has gone to Rowe laments how hard it is to explain what is special about the camp … [Read more...]
My Mother’s Cancer: Inside the Body of a Warrior
[Image description: This photograph shows the author on the left and his mother on the right. The author is a young mixed-race man, with a medium skin tone and shoulder-length straightened hair, sitting on a ledge. He is wearing sunglasses, a billed beanie, and a white shirt and jeans. His mother is a Black woman with dark skin, curly black hair, a white visor, glasses, and a … [Read more...]
The 10 Most Important Things Kids Living with Someone with a Mental Illness Need to Know
Being a mother and living with a mental illness, I get many parents asking me if and how they should talk to their kids about mental illness. When I tell people that yes, they should talk to their kids and be honest with them about their loved one with mental illness, many parents insist I am wrong. They assume kids can not handle learning about mental illness and that they … [Read more...]
Where is My Son? A Glimpse into Living with Dementia
On Tuesday, I woke up with a start. I checked my phone and saw that it was 11 am. I immediately panicked because I thought I’d slept through my alarm and had not taken my son to school. I called for my son to come into my room, but he did not come in. I called again, with no response. I got annoyed because I figured he must be in his room with his headphones on. I went into his … [Read more...]
“Hold Onto Your Other Identities:” 5 Ways to Put Yourself First While Parenting
1.Pick one thing a month just for you. For me this began with my trapeze class. I realized after watching my kids do this amazing activity for two years that I wanted in on the adventure. But for months, I paraded a laundry list of excuses many which included my time involvement as a parent. Would I be able afford a class for myself? Could I reasonably carve out the time? … [Read more...]
Trusting and Listening: Parenting at the Intersection of Race and Disability
My eleven-year-old daughter, the one who self-identifies as an “Aspie,” sits at the table with her art instructor and fellow students. Today, they discuss community art and make plans to create posters to hang around our town. They brainstorm advice they’d give from their eighty-year-old selves. Because they are children from nine to eleven, the answers prove hilarious and … [Read more...]

The Body Is Not an Apology
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