“Wait—your parents are still married?” The therapist stared at me, his mouth agape. “To each other?!” I nodded warily at this abrupt shift in the tone of our conversation. I was 24 years old and still new to the mechanics of therapy. Just moments before, this man—himself old enough to be my father—had been explaining how all families, loving or otherwise, could be a … [Read more...]
Intersectional Feminism: 5 Ways West Indian Women Reinforce Patriarchy
This article was originally published on West Indian Critic and is republished with permission. One of the aspects of weaving intersectional feminism into your life as a Caribbean woman involves a lengthy process of unlearning the damaging ideas and beliefs thrust upon you by Caribbean society. Even if I once had a West Indian teacher wrongfully assert that the Caribbean … [Read more...]
5 Ways to Help Kids Think Outside the Gender Binary
When I was in middle school, I would ask my mom if I could watch certain TV shows other kids were watching: FRIENDS, Scrubs, etc. She said sure (she’s pretty chill about stuff like that), but she told me there were a lot of jokes I wouldn’t get. She was right. I didn’t understand why the laugh track played when Ross forcibly won’t let his toddler son play with a … [Read more...]
7 Tips for White Parents to Talk to Their Kids About Police Murders of Black People
As a white parent of white kids it would be very easy to ignore the police murders of black people and other people of color. However, as a halfway decent person who wants to raise kids who are not monsters I believe that as white people talking to our kids about white privilege and what is happening in this country to people of color is the literal least we can do. I know it … [Read more...]
10 Ways to Support Sex-Positive Kids
One of my key jobs as a parent is to raise kids who love themselves and their sexuality. My own childhood was filled with silences and horrible caveats about sex. My mother told me repeatedly that she would ‘snap my spine’ if I had sex outside of monogamous marriage. And that sex ‘was not all that it what was cracked up to be.’ (A lot of violent cracking … [Read more...]
7 Things I Teach My Kids About Consent, Sexual Harassment and Assault
During a crowded bus journey my daughter's shrill voice--aged four--piped up clearly and succinctly above the hum of the ongoing conversation. "I would like to have sex with [insert classmate here]." A silence not unlike the one which pervades the moment before the conductor raises his baton fell in anticipation of my reply. And on behalf of all the sex-positive parents, I … [Read more...]
10 Radical Parenting Resources for Folks of Color, Part 1
This piece first appeared on the author’s blog, Chicana M(other)work, and is reprinted here by permission. Ever since I became a mother seven years ago, I have struggled to find parenting resources that reflect my visions for social justice. I am not interested in resources that reinforce neoliberal ideologies, rather, I want revolution! The following is a list of 10 … [Read more...]
Fat Parenting 101: 7 Things to Know as a Fat Parent
Parents of all sizes have to navigate how to teach their kids about bodies. But for us fat parents it can be even more challenging because we have to deal with internalized fatphobia as well as the fatphobia directed at us from the world (and sometimes our kids). These thoughts are things that have worked for me as I have navigated being a fat parent raising (hopefully) … [Read more...]
Being a Feminist Mother is a Liberating Experience
This piece first appeared on the author’s blog, Feminism in India, and is reprinted here by permission. My intersectional identity is four fold. I am an Asian/Indian mother; I have a mixed race daughter, I live in a Western country (UK) and I am a feminist mother. I find it hard to tell which part of my identity it is that led me to feminism. When I was growing up in … [Read more...]
3 Problems With Talking to White Kids About Trump
Since Donald Trump was elected president of the United States, there have been tons of articles about talking to your kids about a Donald Trump presidency. As parents this is a hard thing to talk about – I get it. I was originally going to write one of these articles myself, but anxiety and other things have kept me unable to write anything until today. But as I read through … [Read more...]
Practicing Radical Self Love as a Single Mother: Finding Yourself Again
Loving myself as a single parent has been a topic that has been on my mind for some time. Now, before you continue to read, let me warn you I am going to be super honest about how I feel and where I am with this. You might agree, and you might not, and that’s okay; we all have our own thoughts and our feelings. I’m quite sure that there are many other single mothers who feel as … [Read more...]
Building Bridges: How My Disabled Child Teaches Us to Honor Both Our Difference & Sameness
When my daughter with Down syndrome was first born I feared there would be a gap between us because of Down syndrome. I read a book which pointed that those of us with children with disabilities different from the ones we might possess were separate from us. I imagined in those early days gaps and fissures that I might never bridge. She would see the world different from me, … [Read more...]
