I’m that girl, the one everybody goes to when there’s a crisis. I’m there, sorting it, finding out, lending a hand, raising money. That’s me. That was me. Then, one day, I was the crisis. And Then She Fell is the soft title of a memoir of recent events that I never plan to write. I keep making up titles for the not-book, though. It helps me try to make sense of senseless … [Read more...]
Finding Peace in Putting Myself First
Until a few years ago, radical self-love was a foreign concept to me. Growing up in a culture in which women are secondary to everything and everyone else, I thought that self-love was selfish. How could I love myself more than my partner or my children? I’m sure many women can relate to that question. We are taught, from the time we are little girls, that boys are first. I … [Read more...]
Why My Broken Body is Worthy of Delighting In
This article first appeared on Postmodern Woman and is reprinted with permission Content Warning: For Discussion of Sexual Assault This past year has been so exhausting. Not because I was working hard (though I have been), not because I'm still in mourning (which I am), and not because I desperately miss my family and friends (which I do). No, the reason is much more insidious … [Read more...]
Perfection is Hazardous and Scars are Inevitable So I Might As Well Learn to Love Them
Even though I know no body is perfect — unblemished — it’s very difficult for me to come to terms with acquiring a new scar. The moment I start to feel the physical pain, I also begin berating myself for being careless — or wishing I could go back in time to not do the thing that will leave a permanent mark. In addition to being aesthetically unpalatable to me as a … [Read more...]
Losing My Religion (Literally): On Atheism, Acceptance, and A Little Advice
The fact that my father never came to mass with the rest us didn’t bother me as a child. It registered in the same capacity as the fact that he worked night shifts or that Spanish was spoken in my house as often as English—distinctions between my home life and that of my peers, but nothing worth an existential crisis. I was seven or eight when I stood in our garage and asked … [Read more...]
Let’s F#ck It Up: 3 Things They Don’t Want You To Know About Taking A Revolutionary Selfie
“This is an experiment in not being afraid of seeing myself. Of not being afraid of seeing my body. And, more importantly for me, not being afraid of other people seeing these things. So, enjoy the photos. I'm not sure all of them will be flattering, but I hope to have more than 314 pictures by the end of this year.” These are the words that opened my first self-love photo … [Read more...]
We Are What We Eat: Food Justice As An Act of Radical Self Love
I came late to the food justice movement. I wasn’t even really aware of what food justice was again until 2004 when I first heard of calls to boycott Taco Bell by tomato pickers. I was living in Tampa, Florida at the time and had to commute past farms in order to get to work. As news of the boycott spread, I began to see the people working in those fields who were mostly … [Read more...]
What I Teach My Son When I Say I Am Fat: Practicing Self Love for Our Children’s Sake
This piece first appeared on the author's blog, Bipolar Spirit, and is reprinted here by permission. You can read more of Katie's work on her site RevKatieNorris.com. In When Your Mother Says She's Fat by Kasey Edwards, the author writes a letter to her mom about what she learned when her mother insulted herself about her weight. What Edwards learned struck a cord for me – and … [Read more...]
Maintaining Your Safe Space
The Body Is Not an Apology’s goal is to share the myriad ways human bodies unshackle the box of “beauty” and fling it wide open for all of us to access. Our goal is to redefine the unapologetic, radically amazing magnificence of EVERY BODY on this planet. When we do, we change the world! Join the movement and become a subscriber today! bit.ly/NoBodiesInvisible. Like many … [Read more...]
Yes, I Deserve Help: Disability and Asking for What We Need
I went back to college this past fall after taking two years off. I've always been good at school, often to the detriment of my mental health, but I'd assumed that I would be able to pick up where I’d left off and keep up with the workload demanded of me. It wasn’t true. Suddenly, the workload was too much for me. During my first three weeks back in school, I must have had a … [Read more...]
On This Edge: Creating Safe Space for Gender-Neutral Youth
I started going to Rowe Camp, a small summer camp nestled in the mountains of western Massachusetts, when I was twelve years old. I fell in love with the camp immediately and spent every subsequent summer of my teenage years in the verdant woods and graffitied cabins of Rowe. Everyone I've met who has gone to Rowe laments how hard it is to explain what is special about the camp … [Read more...]
5 Myths That Are Keeping You From Having a Fabulous Fattitude
by Nadia Nadeem, Guest Writer Source: Tumblr [Image description: On a white background in blue print, the graphic reads, “Fat is not a bad word. It is not synonymous with ugly, lazy, unattractive, disgusting, or unhealthy. It’s just another adjective to describe how you look. Stop putting stigma on fat. Fat means fat. Nothing more. Nothing less.” The sign is pinned, … [Read more...]
6 Things We Want Sophie and All Little Kids to Know the Next Time They Feel Pressured by Barbie or Anyone Else!
Facebook was ablaze yesterday with a sweet little girl named Sophie who was being interviewed by her father in the wake of a blue nail polish and Barbie debacle. Sophie was upset and imploring her daddy to understand that she was unduly pressured by those sneaky Barbies to paint their nails. We felt such compassion for sweet Sophie that we wrote her a letter we hope she … [Read more...]
The New York Times, Racism, and the Politics of Discomfort
On July 1, The New York Times Op-Docs page published a short documentary called A Conversation with White People on Race (transcript below). The video runs a little over five minutes. https://youtu.be/xXow7olFyIM My take away? If this is how white people have a conversation about race, it’s perfectly apparent why nothing is changing. The video features white people, … [Read more...]
