I remember once when I was thirteen years old in the middle of PE class. A teacher came along and told us that we would soon be having swimming lessons over at a nearby private school’s swimming facilities. At first, I was excited. I like swimming, I had a swimming pool at home, and my standard swimming costume of a one-piece, a rash shirt, and board shorts was something I … [Read more...]
Summer Is Not for Street Harassment — Regardless of Gender, Race, or Size
Ah, summer. Enduring six months of a freezing New England hellscape in order to re-enter the world of soft, swirling sand dunes and jeweled salty ocean waves. The perfume of sunscreen. Living in the city, battling the humidity as I take my dog to the park. Existing as a curvy, white, queer femme, cisgender woman. Feeling men’s eyes travel over my ass and my boobs as I walk down … [Read more...]
How I Learned To Challenge Fat Discrimination in Healthcare
I have always been proactive about my health. Even when I was more disconnected from my body in the past, I still worked hard to address issues as they arose. I have dealt with a variety of issues over the years and often had to take my health into my own hands. Fat discrimination in the health industry is something I've read and known about, but I really thought I had been … [Read more...]
Exercise Isn’t Just About Weight Loss: 10 Tips To Navigate Radical Self-Love and Exercise Culture
Exercise can be a valuable tool for self love. Through exercise, we can learn about our bodies, we can become stronger and more agile, and we can enjoy myriad physical and mental health benefits. Unfortunately, for many of us, exercise feels more like a tool for self hate than for self love, and I blame this on how strongly exercise is associated with weight loss. I spent most … [Read more...]
New Year, Same You: An Anti-Resolution To Lose the Weight of Body Shame
For the past two years, I have worked in Online Marketing for a company that sells fast-moving consumer goods (grocery foods and small gifts, mostly). Every January, my company pushes so-called ‘diet’ items, and I am normally one of the people who does the copywriting for the relevant promotions. As my fingers tap out words like ‘detox’, ‘healthy’, and ‘new start,’ I feel a … [Read more...]
In Response to Sean Grant: Online Bullying, Misogynoir, and the Concept of Being an “Ugly Black Woman”
On Tuesday, November 27th, Facebook alerted me that a man named Sean Grant posted a picture of me. I didn’t and don’t know Sean. But, I recently performed at book release for the phenomenal Bay area poet, James Cagney, and thought that perhaps he was someone who attended the reading and snapped a shot. I was excited to see what was there because I knew that I was styling and … [Read more...]
Take The Cake: Dear Fat Girl, Do You Know How Powerful You Are?
This article by Virgie Tovar originally appeared on Ravishly and has been republished with permission. A question that has been haunting me for well over a month now is one that was posed to me by an ultra cute, very smart fat girl. She asked me how I learned to give up on the dream of being a desirable, beautiful, sexy thin person. Her question seemed to unveil a worldview … [Read more...]
Loose Skin, Stretch Marks, and Cellulite, Oh My: How I Gathered the Courage to Disrupt My Self-Hatred
This article originally appeared in Rarely Wears Lipstick under the title "Fat Bodies, Uneven Skin, and the Courage to Disrupt" and is reprinted by permission from the writer. Content note: this article contains detailed references to body shame, including slang terms for features ascribed to fat bodies and wishes of weight loss, that may be triggering for some … [Read more...]
Every Body Is a Beach Body: 5 Ways To Rock Your Body (No Matter Its Size or Shape) This Summer
Every year, usually around April or May, I will be on a train, idly looking at the billboards displayed along passing stations, when I will come across the first piece of “beach body”-related advertising of the season. “Get Beach Body Ready!” the ad boasts, displaying a photo of a pretty, young, white, usually female person, with thick, wavy hair, lightly tanned skin, and a … [Read more...]
Breaking Out Of The “Acceptable:” I Don’t Have to Explain Away My Fatness
I would like to start this article with some good news: Acceptance of body diversity is happening, and it is amazing! There is no doubt about it, either. Between the new range of Barbie dolls in four different body types to the continual establishment of high street fashion retailers that cater to “different” bodies (such as Bravissimo for large-busted women and Long Tall … [Read more...]
The Dangers of Body Shaming
The Body Is Not an Apology’s goal is to share the myriad ways human bodies unshackle the box of “beauty” and fling it wide open for all of us to access. Our goal is to redefine the unapologetic, radically amazing magnificence of EVERY BODY on this planet. When we do, we change the world! Join the movement and become a subscriber … [Read more...]
Loving My Body’s Changes: Aging and My Belly
I might be different from other women because I’ve never felt the pressure to conform to the standards of beauty. When I go to a doctor’s office, I’m more likely to pick up the National Geographic than the Cosmo. If Cosmo is the only option, I’ll stare at the wall. I’ve never kept up with the seasonal fashion and make-up trends. I hate the feel of makeup on my face. I don’t … [Read more...]
It Ain’t About Weight: Learning to Find Health At Every Size
At this point in my radical self love journey, the word “health” is much more triggering for me to hear than the word “fat.” In fact, fat is a word that I happily use to describe myself. I have found community and solidarity around a word that was once represented a deep wound. But the word health still stirs up a lot of emotions for me now; mostly because, it is often used by … [Read more...]
Telling People They Are Beautiful
I’m really active on Facebook. I like posting funny things I do/see, calling out to people for help, and seeing what my loved ones are doing. And I particularly enjoy commenting on pictures my friends post of themselves. My comments are sometimes funny, flirty, and almost always telling them that they’re beautiful. When I spend time with my friends, I jump on whatever … [Read more...]

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