As a young person, I didn’t have any queer adult mentors to teach me about the positivity of exploring my sexual orientation, not to mention my gender identity. Most of what I learned about being LGBTIQ came from '90s mainstream media and my Gay Straight Alliance in high school. After high school, a couple of my friends eventually came out as gay. I listened and learned from … [Read more...]
“Normal” Bodies Don’t Exist: Celebrating Your Body in the Face of Fatphobia
I remember once when I was thirteen years old in the middle of PE class. A teacher came along and told us that we would soon be having swimming lessons over at a nearby private school’s swimming facilities. At first, I was excited. I like swimming, I had a swimming pool at home, and my standard swimming costume of a one-piece, a rash shirt, and board shorts was something I … [Read more...]
6 Ways To Support a Friend After a Sexual Assault
From the stories unearthed by the #MeToo movement started by Tarana Burke, to #TimesUp, to sexual harassment and assault scandals surrounding such high-profile figures as Brett Kavanaugh, Donald Trump, and Jeffrey Epstein, it’s important to consider the effects these highly publicized incidents may have on those of us who have experienced sexual assault, abuse, or harassment in … [Read more...]
Mixed-Race, Non-Binary, Queer Fat Femme: How I Fail and Succeed in Finding Liberation
I am a Black, mixed-race, fat, queer, non-binary person. Most saliently, I am femme. I have come to understand radical femmeness, femme magic, femme community, femme love, and femme power through my relationships with other womxn and femmes of color. While femme communities evoke safeness and security for me, they also often exist on the basis of trauma. Femininity leaves us … [Read more...]
Rejecting the “Real Man” Myth: Why Men Should Embrace Their Femininity
Associating oneself with specific “masculine” or “feminine” traits is a big part of how most people define their gender identities. However, some of the biggest issues arise when it is deemed “inappropriate” for someone to exhibit traits of the “opposite” gender. Take, for example, men who exhibit a strong sense of emotional sensitivity. This trait is typically aligned with … [Read more...]
7 Ways to Make Your Social Justice Space Accessible to Disabled People
Most social justice movements make a point to be inclusive of as many people as possible, especially marginalized communities. Those movements that don’t do so should. But one group that is often overlooked is disabled people, even though we exist inside every other affinity group. As someone who belongs to multiple “othered” communities (disabled, transgender, working-class, … [Read more...]
5 Dehumanizing Myths About Fat Men and Dating That We Can’t Excuse
About a month ago, one of my sisters tagged me in a video she recorded of Family Feud, a game show where two families compete for a cash prize by trying to find the most popular answers to a variety of questions. On the episode she recorded, host and comedian Steve Harvey asks the contestants to answer a rather loaded statement: “Name a reason a woman might decide to be with a … [Read more...]
The Strain of “Model Minority”: Addressing the Mental Health Needs of Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders
Just last year, when a person very close to me admitted she was struggling with depression, my initial internal reaction was disbelief. This can’t be true, I thought. My next thought was mortification for feeling this way. Why was it that I, a socially conscious person who believes strongly in mental health advocacy, immediately felt incredulity? I had to be honest with … [Read more...]
Who Really Needs a Wheelchair?: Let’s Stop Accusing Disabled Folks of Being Lazy
A few years ago, the disability organization I was working with took a field trip to a performance starring dancers in wheelchairs. As usual, I was cautiously excited: while the people we served lived with a variety of physical and intellectual disabilities, I was the only disabled person on staff. The other staff members sometimes “got it” when it came to disability issues, … [Read more...]
5 Ways to Help Someone in a Mental Health Emergency Without Calling the Police
With the continued crisis of police violence against Black people, including the murder of people in mental and/or physical health crisis, it's more clear than ever that we need to be extremely thoughtful about calling the police. In fact, we should do everything we can to keep the police from being called. When someone is having a mental health emergency, the people around … [Read more...]
7 Ways Anxiety Can Affect a Person (That You Might Not Know)
I have dealt with anxiety since I was a teenager. As it is a chronic condition, the severity of it comes and goes. Sometimes I feel fine; the anxiety is quietly humming away in the background and I can carry on as normal. Other times, I feel so unwell that I can’t do much more than get out of bed. It is not unheard of for me to take a day off from work or cancel an … [Read more...]
Six Ways to Talk about STIs (Without Being a Jerk)
Whenever the topic of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) comes up, I secretly get excited and panicked at the same time. I get excited because, as a person with herpes, and specifically as a writer with herpes, I spend a lot of time considering the complexities of what it means to live in a shared body with a virus, particularly one on which society has imposed a code of … [Read more...]
“You Do Not Exist To Be Used”: Why Your Life Purpose Is Bigger Than Capitalist Productivity
My childhood was colored by my experiences navigating my disabilities. At an early age I was diagnosed with ADHD, hearing loss, and dealt with a neuromuscular disease that was later in life diagnosed as myasthenia gravis. Ever since the age I was able to attend school, academia has been a primary source of stress and poor self-worth for me. The school system was by far the … [Read more...]
Why We Need to Stop Shaming Teen Parents
In recent years, teen pregnancy in the US has been at an all -time low. From 2012 to 2013, teen birth rates decreased among 15–19 year olds by 9% for non-Hispanic whites and 11% for non-Hispanic blacks. If there are fewer teenage pregnancies, why is it that so many people still make it such a shameful thing to be pregnant as a teenager? I’ve heard people say that teenagers back … [Read more...]
