Winter break is a time we all tend to pick up a book, but are our choices political?… Our viewpoints have changed to reflect our cultural consciousness — and yet queer, disabled, and non-white people still don’t make it into the future.
Having full autonomy of one’s body and family planning is so crucial to my and others’ communities. This is something that we have been fighting since before the 50’s. Getting an IUD, for me, was resisting against a man who doesn’t even know me and thinks I need to shut my mouth, along with my legs.
The holidays come with special challenges for many of us . For me, it’s the social obligations. It’s about the most dangerous person I have dealt with in the past…me and the inner thoughts that cut me down – the voices of shame, and comparison that come from within me before they come from anyone else. But this year that is changing!
To me, maturity is a shifting and growing in-depth understanding of ourselves, how we operate in relation to others, and how our past experiences and traumas influence our feelings, attitudes, and actions.
There must have been a time when I didn’t do any calculations before I ate. When I ate what I wanted. When I could tell what I wanted.
I am a person who is always striving to be better and learn more about myself and the world around me. Recognizing that therapy might be an integral part of my growth over the course of my lifetime is freeing.
I’ve done a lot of work to find ways to manage my emotions when being with my partner’s family during the holidays. But perhaps more importantly, my partner and his family have done work too.
Here are some ways that we’ve managed to survive the holidays as a cross-class couple:
Don’t judge your feelings—or those of anyone else (which is easier said then done). There is no right or wrong way on the road of emotions. It’s as valid to have a cheerful Christmas as it is to have an unhappy one.
If you don’t believe whitesplaining is wrong, then you’re missing how the motivation behind whitesplaining is influenced by white supremacy. So let’s unpack the most common reasons why whitesplaining happens, to examine why it’s so misguided.
Because I had never learned the art of caring for my own self, I quietly expected from loved ones the same love and attention I was showing them.
Don’t Purge Your White Friends on Facebook: 8 Actions for Racially Aware White Folks Before Unfriending a Bigot
Do not purge your followers of all your white friends who espouse #alllivesmatter, your family who shout about black-on-black crime, and your former colleagues who are adamant they are victims of reverse racism. At least, not YET.
Another problematic thing to say to a child wrestling with their sexuality is “it’s just a phase”. This is problematic because this again trivializes what is real, which is that exploration of one’s sexuality is not a thing that a person can “overcome” and “get over”. It is part of person’s journey into authentic selfhood.
Many people have asked the question, how can you transition if you’re not male or female? What are you transitioning to? The answer is different for every non-binary person. What we do know is we are all valid in our bodies and genders. The way we see ourselves and dress ourselves and take care of ourselves should be what makes us happy. It can be a struggle, for both cis and trans people, to love ourselves and our bodies.
Whether you have a FUPA because of a pregnancy or because you have added some extra pounds throughout the years, love that part of your body. It’s part of you. It’s part of your story, of your journey. No one else in this world has one just like yours. To practice radical self-love, we have to love every single inch of who we are.
Look back at the recent past and ask yourself, “When was I getting along best with my body?”